To understand why we repeatedly behave and respond in ways that prevent us from developing secure attachments, we must first understand what we thought, what we felt, and what we did in response to relational triggers in various life stages: as a child, as an adolescent, and as an adult. By learning how these survival patterns developed throughout these three stages, clients are able to develop healthy repairs — behaviors that are substituted for early repairs that no longer serve the client.
The ability to recognize when and where the adolescent is navigating a situation, or when the child is crying for help in real time, allows the client the freedom to pause and choose “to do it differently,” responding authentically and confidently from a place of vertical alignment. The healthy adult then takes over as a healer for the child, the adolescent, and the unhealthy adult in all interactions. Much like the peace of mind that comes with learning to live for years without the influence of chemical dependence, emotional peace and mental clarity are the products of living and interacting as the authentic self — or “healthy adult.” The healthy adult exists inside every client – even in the midst of withdrawal pain. It is the collective aim of the facilitator to teach and the resident to utilize the PIVOT curriculum to access and learn to rely on the healthy adult to repair and restore relational wounds.